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Want to stop beating yourself up?
a quick tip
The Leadership Programme.
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I felt the need to do something different this week, here goes.
Ever get stuck in a loop, replaying what you said wrong, and could have said better, more tactfully, quicker, funnier, smarter?
I used to do this ALL THE TIME. I’d replay conversations.
‘What would happen, if I’d said something smarter, or said ‘what they said’ and been insightful?’
If I said the wrong thing I would beat myself up.
And the other person has no clue you have it on repeat. They’ve probably already forgotten it and moved on.
It’s just unhealthy.
You know that.
I know that.
Everyone knows that, but we still do it.
And imposter syndrome doesn’t help.
I’d replay conversations that had happened, 10 - 15 yrs ago, maybe longer.
It was always those conversations that made me feel inadequate in some way.
Or made me frustrated
Or made me angry.
This is unhelpful. We can’t change it so it’s a waste of time, and it makes us feel unworthy.
It reinforces that negative emotion and it anchors that emotion to us.
Each time we go back to it, it reinforces that emotion in us again, making us more likely to feel it again. See what I mean? Unhelpful.
There are lots of ways of dealing with this but here’s a quick technique you can do anywhere.
And it’s simple. It feels better for me to explain it though, so here’s a very quick video.
Whenever that thought comes back ( which it will; it will kick and struggle for attention), ground yourself in the present.
Over time it loses it’s power. You break that bond and disconnect the emotion from it.
Let me know how you get on.
Please don’t hesitate to forward this, to help others learn.
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Action for the week!
Want to have a practice?
You know what you need to do …
Extra resources
Additional resources you may want to check out.
PARENTAL ADVISORY this is a fabulous book, but hard going because of heavy language. It deals with spirituality, as well as how we are wired to look at the world and deal with our emotions.
Here’s an Amazon ( affiliate) link so you can see what it's like, but I’d prefer it if you ordered from your local bookshop. May not be as quick, but a better soul-feeding activity.
Music to get you ready for the weekend!
A mega playlist of supersonic tracks, to get you in the mood for the weekend.
Ok, here we go. Not something I’d ordinarily include, but by popular demand, something you can REALLY bang your head to. 🎸🎸
I have a particular soft spot for this track. (It reminds me of a series called the Young Ones). Let’s face it, it’s a goodun’.
I suggest you go for it and be prepared to be dizzy afterwards.
Other ways I can help:
1:1 coaching to help you develop the leadership skills you need to take your career to the next level. Let’s have a chat. Calendly link here.
FREE RESOURCES Interview Mastery training: to master confidence at that BIG event. It could be an interview, public speaking, or that pitch. Make sure that the very best version of you shows up to that interview. Link here.
